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**Younes** · (This post was last modified: 11-22-2011 12:06 AM by Younes.)

Pretty Dope man... Not bad... if we refrain from talking bout the beat n mastering n shit... I really liked it... flow needs abit of work, your lyrics also needs to be smoother so it's easier to drop em on the beat... and easier to hear..

Kinda like Rev. 1, where Technique had the hardest shit to rap...

"Specifically prolific with coprocessor coma type sickness" - Dominant Species..

its very.... what u call it? uneffective when u need to flow well...

**Raheem** · (This post was last modified: 11-22-2011 01:28 AM by Raheem.)

(11-22-2011 12:06 AM)Younes Wrote: Pretty Dope man... Not bad... if we refrain from talking bout the beat n mastering n shit... I really liked it... flow needs abit of work, your lyrics also needs to be smoother so it's easier to drop em on the beat... and easier to hear..

Kinda like Rev. 1, where Technique had the hardest shit to rap...

"Specifically prolific with coprocessor coma type sickness" - Dominant Species..

its very.... what u call it? uneffective when u need to flow well...

Thanks man, I agree. My mastering needs a lot of work, and the beat, well I just chose it in a hurry.
I think reason by my flow doesn't come out as smooth is because I have braces lol. So I'm not able to say some words the way I want to.
like the words, "roam", "that's", "didn't", and "reign".

But thanks Y'all!

**Priya** · 01-15-2012, 12:58 AM

Whoaaa props to you both! Shak, the beat is fucking dope and Frankiee you have a great voice. Good stuff =)

**Gezus** · 01-15-2012, 01:07 AM

Nice beat, Shak. Great track, like the lyrics and also like your voice.

Once thing though. It was a bit to low volume. I had youtube at max and my computer at 30% with headphones. usually i have to turn down youtube volume for tracks but with this one i had to turn up my computer volume considerably. =/

**Asshole** · 01-15-2012, 01:08 AM

you need more syllables per line with that beat i felt like the meter and beat didn't match. i dig the voice and lyrics by themselves though

**Raheem** · 01-15-2012, 07:17 AM

Thanks to all!

The beat was just too ill. One of my favorite tracks I've done. Which are three haha.

Well idk if it's my computer or what but maybe I DO have to increase the volume a bit, but it sounded good on mine. But I'm barely starting ya know?

and yeah laz, I just put something together too fast that I didn't have the chance to revise the words.
like I said, thanks to all!

**Djoser** · 01-15-2012, 08:30 AM

(01-15-2012 01:08 AM)Laz Wrote: you need more syllables per line with that beat i felt like the meter and beat didn't match. i dig the voice and lyrics by themselves though

Well not only that but your rapping maybe a bit fast where the syllables don't land on the snare.

**Raheem** · 01-15-2012, 08:33 AM

True true. I still have to work on a lot. But thanks for the criticism.

**Priya** · 02-01-2012, 06:24 AM

(01-31-2012 05:00 AM)frankiee13 Wrote: If that's not possible here's all my recent work.
Keep in mind, I'm just starting so it's pretty bad. lol.
Don't enjoy.

Why are you so negative man? Be confident and proud of the work you do!

I personally love The Godly Hypocrites. I think you're dope for someone who's "just starting".

**skillztheprotege** · 02-01-2012, 03:35 PM

yh I had braces past 2 years even words ib Portuguese was cpmplicated sometimes

**Raheem** · 02-01-2012, 06:40 PM

(02-01-2012 06:24 AM)Priya Wrote: Why are you so negative man? Be confident and proud of the work you do!

I personally love The Godly Hypocrites. I think you're dope for someone who's "just starting".

I was just thinking about that last night.
I was saying to myself to be patient and confident with this music thing (even though I don't plan on it being my money maker). That I need to stop comparing my art form to other peoples music and to remember why I started to write and why I started to record. & that's to express myself for myself.
Thanks Priya, I'll stay positive.

**Raheem** · 02-01-2012, 06:42 PM

(02-01-2012 03:35 PM)skillztheprotege Wrote: yh I had braces past 2 years even words ib Portuguese was cpmplicated sometimes

yeah man is pretty difficult. I can't wait till i get them off.